Spiritually we have often been reincarnated with our children in previous lives, when we chose to be reborn with the same people there is always a reason, a lesson to learn or a wrong to right. Sometimes the previous lives we have led together have been rich and fulfilling and sometimes they have been dangerous and tragic, some of that can be left over and stopping us from connecting with our children. Spiritual children can often remember their most recent past life, so could there be another mummy – listen to them, this can be a past life memory and can help you understand why your family is configured the way it is. It’s also good to be aware of memories and situations you and your children find yourself in, any difficult relationships in your family and any dreams – they can all help you work out if you have been together before.
Before five years old a lot of children have an ability to communicate with spirit and clearly remember their previous lives, but it all too often disappears. As children learn the ‘left brain’ subjects like reading, writing, science etc.. they become more logical minded and analytical. As they grow that spiritual ability which is much more creative and esoterically based is questioned and the ability lost. Interestingly at five years old a child’s brain completes its critical development stages, there is development of the part of the brain used to understand spatial concepts in maths, abstract thinking, language and other left brain concepts. So along with a world that can ridicule spiritual children who are aware of spirit and a huge amount of brain development it’s no wonder that ability fades.
So how do we connect with our children and encourage them to be spiritual children, we know all about nutrition, education, exercise and attachment. The media and it seems like everyone else is an expert on how to bring our kids up, but how do we nurture them spiritually? It’s certainly not based around any one religions teaching, or a prescribed way of being, it’s about being honest and encouraging a sense of wonder and adding magic to their lives. Here are a few ideas you may like to try.
Listen to your children, set aside time to really listen to them, you will be amazed at what they say, the intuition they have, the needs they have and the burdens they have given themselves, you will be in awe of some of the intuition that spiritual children have. For example do you know if your child is supporting a friend through hard times and how this affecting them, do you know if they don’t feel like you trust them. So take time to listen, don’t talk just listen. Then if you can, take action to help them, if not be there to support them.
Although some kids need structure, wherever possible be spontaneous, do things on the spur of the moment without planning, spiritual children feel most inspired when surprised. Break routine and ask them for ideas, involve them to help create a sense of belonging.
Forgive yourself, if you shouted at them, did not have time to be there or any other misdemeanour’s, you should let it go and learn from it. Start again, apologise, make time or explain what happened and then move on. The same applies, within boundaries for children, let then learn from their mistakes and then let them go.
Let them have the joy in their lives, so when something bring them joy like the mole in your garden who has just dug up the flower beds, let them see Mr Mole from the Wind in the Willows! Let them use their imaginations to bring them joy, being creative, running round the countryside, whatever it is. Use your creativity too, tell stories and join in with their games.
Acknowledge that you are learning from your children, as their curiosity grows you will be amazed what they learn and what they want to tell you. It’s a good idea to be especially aware of their feeling and thoughts about the life changing issues they face (these may not be life changing to us) along with the big issues for the world.
Be honest you don’t have all the answers, especially around spiritual issues; honesty is always the best policy. It’s a good idea to share your beliefs and the fact that other people may not believe what you do. This helps spiritual children to open their minds to all types of spirituality.
When your children hit their teens something changes, arguments, door slamming and even worse, a lot of people blame it on the hormones. Did you know that the brain starts to develop again at speed? The communication connectivity in the brain increases, emotional connectivity is increased and reactions heighten by this, those pesky hormones also affect how the brain reacts to stress, the capacity to learn is at its greatest and the section of the brain that deals with sleep regulation is changed. This may explain why your teenager thinks its ok to scream at you, slam the door and return 20 minutes later, ask to borrow money and wonder why you are upset!!
This is the time when your connection with your child is at its most difficult and the time you may wonder what went wrong. But that connectivity is still there strained by all the changes that your child is going through, but still as strong. All of the above still apply with added patience on your part and above all they will know and feel your love even when the door slams again!
But remember you will make mistakes as no one is a perfect parent, but as long as you love them, honour them and respect them you will have connected with your kids up in the best possible way.