How to Deal With Grief

April 13, 2016

If you are looking to reconnect with a loved one, whether person or pet, your first course of action maybe to not only deal with the grief but find ways to overcome it.  Some Mediums will tell you your grief acts like a thicket of webs your deceased loved ones need to wade through to get to you. The more you can help clear what they deem as emotional clutter that is heavy and burdensome for you to carry and for them to maneuver through, the sooner you can experience their connection.

I have come to agree with this thinking having listened in and partaking in numerous sessions with mediums connecting with deceased loved ones. Never once, despite death experiences or passing’s that were perceived as difficult, do you hear loved ones complain about their pain or these difficulties. They are always concerned with making you happy and feeling whole again. They are already there and would like you to join them.

Maybe you are dealing with a different type of grief than the loss of a loved one. Any loss or separation perceived by our mind will eventually touch our heart and spirit. It is this trigger that starts our grief process.

This all sounds so harsh, but regardless of the grief our lives are being touched by, it only helps us if we move on from it. The overwhelming emotions that can accompany grief need to somehow be recognized and overcome. I know this may sound like an impossible feat – especially to those who are in the mist of grief – but you need to train the mind, which will in turn touch your heart, to view and then feel things with a new perspective.

We can become further traumatized by our grief when we feel we have lost control of our situation or we are internalizing our anguish and fears. A wise guide once pointed out it is human to internalize our grief, but it is spiritual to learn from these encounters so we can grow.

This same guide also informs us that if you have someone who is dealing with grief then offer up a style of empathy that allows their grief to stand alone. So many times when we are confronted with another’s grief, our first reaction is I know how you feel because this is my grief. Allowing a beautiful space for their grief alone is where true compassion can flourish.

Also do not buy into preconceived timetables for yours or another’s grief. Family, friends even your work will want to help you decide when you should be ‘back to normal’. Buying into this mindset will only cause you to internalize your emotions and faking it with an ‘all is well’ attitude; all because we are trying to honor another’s point of view instead of our own.

Find a trusted friend or be one to someone dealing with grief. Many times we have internal conflicts and guilt that can drive our grief to dig in deeper. We need to find ways to let these expressions out so we can deal with them and put them to rest – even if the story needs to be repeated and repeated. Be that good friend to yourself and others who do not live by preconceived notions of what is the right or wrong way to grieve or when we should end.

Finally we need to ask, have we really lost our loved one? Aren’t they there for us to contact either through a medium or through your own efforts to be open to be accepting a message. And what many of us have learned in the healing arts this is all possible by reaching a heart centre consciousness that allows to the doors to open.

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