Find Yourself

December 10, 2019

For many years, depression played a big part in my life. I got used to having trouble functioning every day, and I thought that all the negative emotions I experienced on a daily basis, were just part of being alive. As I result, I didn’t care anymore about how I looked, and I turned to food for comfort, stress relief, or as a reward… all the time. I got stuck in an unhealthy cycle where the real feeling or problem was never addressed.

I felt guilty for eating as a form of escapism, and all that guilt made me eat more. Every day, I convinced myself that I wasn’t worth the effort. I was tired of being tired, but had no motivation to change my life. I had no hobbies, no social life, and I lost interest in many things that I used to like. I simply lost control. Many people wouldn’t know it from the outside, but I was falling apart, every day. It took me a long time to recognise that I was in denial, and I needed to take the first step to be myself again. One day, I decided to put myself out of my comfort zone, and seek help. I wasn’t convinced I could do it, but I couldn’t live the way I was living anymore. I knew that emotional hunger couldn’t be filled with food, so I decided to at least try to be in control.

That’s where my journey began. Today, I am grateful that I was able to gradually make the changes that allowed me to reconnect with my inner essence, and to understand I am am worth of trying, no matter how many times I fail. When we think that we are not able to find happiness again, it’s important to find the time to learn upon what we value, and take time to consider what makes up the essence of who we are. Losing weight made me feel that I am able to achieve a better life for myself. Being able to achieve a small goal, made me understand that I can accomplish bigger things. It gave me the freedom and courage to change the direction of my thoughts, and the motivation that made me believe that I have the power to change other areas of my life. Even when I face a setback, instead of letting myself go completely as I did before, now I know that I am able to focus on my abilities, and put myself back on the path to victory.

Finding your self worth is a daily practice. When you’re true to your essence, you never stop looking for your own strengths. Keep in mind that God doesn’t just want us to be alive, but He wants us to enjoy being alive. Follow your passion, and you’ll feel unique and accomplished. Loving yourself and acknowledging your true value is the only way to build your self confidence.

Recognise the small improvements and accomplishments you achieve every day, and do not internalise any negative ideas of who you are, because you are special, wonderful, and worthwhile.

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