July 12, 2016

Learning To Control Fear

Even the people that are known by being courageous have fears to overcome. As we grow up, we gather a stock of good and bad experiences that can turn into fear depending on the emotion attached to them. That’s why children are not afraid of anything, because they don’t have impressions yet. There are many ways that fears develop, and it’s natural and healthy to have a certain degree of fear to avoid previously harmful experiences. But constantly being fearful can cause you a lot of stress and anxiety. It can hold you back in life, stopping you from taking action and preventing you from being successful. Fear is the opposite of success. Great achievements can only be reached from taking risks. The truth is that if you’re controlled by fear, you’ll never be able to be motivated and achieve the success you deserve. Your fears may be keeping you from moving forward with what you want in your life.

Fear is an emotion that causes the body to produce a stress response. Our body responds when danger is perceived, and as the level of fear increases, so does the magnitude of the stress response. Learning to control our fear means bringing our minds to the present moment, in order to evaluate things from a logical perspective. By taking the time to understand where our fears comes from, and analysing our feelings when we experience fear, we’ve taken the first step toward gaining control over our lives.

Reflect on your fears and notice how much they affect your life. When we live in fear, we are always thinking about all the things that could go wrong. Uncertainty is unavoidable, and we need to understand that we can not control everything that happens in our lives.  When we are feeling scared or anxious, mindfulness and meditation will help us get over negative thoughts patterns and give us the power to let go of unhealthy thoughts and beliefs. Use meditation to drop the anxiety about the unknown future. Sit quietly in a comfortable position, take deep breaths in regular intervals, breathe in and out through your nose, and place your hand on your stomach. It should rise as you inhale and lower as you exhale. Free your mind from distractions that cause stress, and just focus on something like a mantra, an object or image. If your mind gets distracted, just bring your thoughts back to what you were focusing before. Keep up with your practice. Meditating daily for 10 minutes can be a great help to control your fears and other negative emotions.

If you prefer, just spare a few moments during your day, to close your eyes and enjoy the moment you are in. Keep reminding yourself that everything happens for the best, in order to let go of negativity and relax your mind. When you have a relaxed mind, you are able to control fear. Anything that allows you to empty your mind of thoughts of the past and present is a form of being mindful and practicing meditation. When you have the ability to bring your attention to focus in the present, you will also find yourself observing things you may not have noticed before, and you will be able to look at what is causing you fear from a different perspective. You will also be able to observe what goes on around you without associating judgement to it. Being mindful is about observing your feelings as an outsider, without sticking to your emotions. It’s a regular exercise of observing and labelling the emotions that you feel, allowing them to rise and fade away, until they pass. You certainly can’t control how things makes you feel, but you can choose not to engage in negative emotions, and stop them from affecting your life.

When you are struggling, look into what your fear might be, and remember to practice mindfulness, so you can think rationally about the fear. Don’t feel bad about it, with all the negativity in the world, it is very common to allow fear and anxiety to have an impact in your life. Fear can keep you stuck in many ways, and sometimes, in order to be successful and achieve what you want, you need to just dare to proceed even while being afraid. Learn to accept the fear, because no one can ever completely destroy it, it’s a part of your defence mechanism. If I’ve learned anything in this life, it’s that the actions that scared me the most at the time, have also paid off the most. Remember that conquering your fears does not mean destroying them, it’s all about taking control and removing the obstacles that prevents you from pursuing what brings joy to your soul.

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