Dealing With An Ungrateful Person

February 20, 2017

Sometimes you can do all you can to help someone only for the person to show an ungrateful attitude towards you. This world is filled with ungrateful people who expects everything and, in return, give little or nothing. I believe that the biggest stressor in dealing with ungrateful people is that we don’t get the gratitude or thankfulness we believe we deserve. Ungrateful people take things you do, and you, for granted. They assume that you’ll continue to be there for them because they deserve to be a priority in your life.

When someone who often takes advantage of your kindness shows no sign of gratitude, it is time to set firm boundaries for yourself as to what you will and won’t do for those people. There does come a point, when your efforts may be better spent on one who does appreciate your good works, not in the sense of giving you effusive praise, but in the sense of being truly thankful for your efforts. Ungrateful people can suck all the energy out of you, monopolise your time, and keep your life off-balance. When someone is consistently selfish, they can make your life miserable. Selfish people can push your buttons and make you feel all kinds of negative emotions. The first piece of advice for dealing with those people, is to be real with yourself. Accept that the ungrateful person might never consider your needs first. As much as this person means to you, know that they may have no regard for your feelings, and don’t play into their game or engage in behaviour that is beneath you. Just be true to yourself. It’s difficult to protect yourself from other people’s negativity, but becoming like them doesn’t help your emotional wellbeing.

How do you know if someone is ungrateful? An ungrateful person do not show gratitude for what someone has done for them. They will never appreciate what they have, because they don’t really value someone else’s attention. The problem with ungrateful people is that they have no idea how to appreciate other’s efforts. It is important to understand the difference between prioritising oneself and being ungrateful. Just because you decide to attend your own needs, it doesn’t necessarily mean you’re actually doing anything wrong. Being unappreciative or ungrateful has to do with neglecting what others do in order to help you, and expect other people to be doing what may be right for you, but not for them.

It is important to find out if the person who is being ungrateful, is being ungrateful purposefully or unintentional. Some people have a natural character that does not show a lot of expressions/emotions towards others and they are not like that because they are ungrateful or rude. Some may be too shy or distracted or it may be just the way they are. On the other hand, there are some people, who have issues around receiving, and instead of gratitude, they will even attack you for your kindness.

I believe that most of us have felt used by someone who we thought were nice at first, and turned out to be ungrateful. I’ve learned not to do good things for people because I want recognition out of it. I’ve also learned that chronically negative and ungrateful people are only going to test you again and again. It is definitely in your best interest to limit your exposure to negativity and ungratefulness. It makes a big difference to remove a constant source of negativity from your life, when you don’t limit your exposure to negative people, you may end up very disconnected from your spiritual essence. Never stop helping people, but learn to help in a way where you don’t ignore your own needs. Ignoring your needs to pour attention and energy into a self-absorbed person isn’t virtuous. Ungratefulness can make you feel emotionally drained and hurt. Focus on what really matters: your happiness. When you do things according to your values and learn to let go of your expectations, you protect yourself from being constantly let down by others. The less you respond to negative people, the more peaceful your life will become.

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