Toxic-Relationship

Being in a Triangle in a Relationship

February 21, 2016

Aside from those that enjoy being a partner in a trio, most aspects of being part of a triangle in a relationship can be difficult but this can be especially true if you are the ‘third wheel’. You may even be in a three sided relationship where one of the other parties does not know of your existence and that they now have expanded their relationship to include a third party. These style scenarios have the potential for emotional hurt to those who are aware of all the dynamics as well as those who are not.
Many astrology signs are reconnecting with old loves from their pasts. The timing or cultural situation during their original romance prevented many from possibly realizing a true love feeling with this person from their past. And as fate will have it at times, their paths cross, a fire is sparked from the flame that has not diminished and they are now involved in a three way or even four way relationship.

Like the above there are many reasons why we can find ourselves with a lover who has another. And many would seem valid for the fact that ultimately for the majority of us we do not feel good sharing someone we care for or love. We may even feel we had them first or that theirs or our current relationships are unhappy. This all may be true but in the end a decision needs to be made as to where do we go from here?

As a Tarot reader I am always trying to decipher the intents, motivations and true desires of the cards for those I am reading for. Many who visit with me for insight have come to a realization they are walking in two worlds and leading two lives and are no longer feeling comfortable in this space. They want something to change. If they are the one waiting for the other to make a final break in a relationship, or if they are the ones who need to leave a current relationship to pursue a new love, one of the first cards I pull is to ask what is blocking or making them reluctant to move forward with a breakup or divorce.

The reasons for holding up this process can be varied. Maybe they are feeling pressure from their parents or feel they will be letting their children down. Finances and the concerns they can foster up can be at the forefront of this type of reading as well. Regardless of the insight that can be gained a decision will need to be made at some point, especially by the one who is feeling the third wheel pressure.

We need to be considerate of our wives, husbands and lovers. Whatever the reasons we stray out of our relationship/marriage or we become involved with someone who is we need to be honest with our intentions to all parties concerned. We need to make sure we are moving towards our happiness, even if it can cause others pain through our honesty, but honest we must be. We also need to take care and support those we hurt if the situation warrants.

If you are the third angle in your triangle, you have two important questions before you. First do you value and respect yourself for being in the relationship? Second does your lover and your relationship value and respect you?

When we arrive at a true evaluation of your love, it can be an interesting place for some because it requires an honest, hard look of the good and the bad – to weigh out your next move.  This exercise is conveyed perfectly in an encounter with the Four of Cups in Tarot. Remarkable this card will always make an appearance at some point in a reading where three parties are involved in a relationship.

The Four of Cups tells us if you like what you are feeling and are valued and you carry no unreal expectations into the relationship, this is an excellent time to really give it your all – something we also must fully realize in our journey through the Cups. However, if there is something gnawing at your internal meter of doubt and discontent – this is the time to bring the issues out to yourself.  If we do not acknowledge these thoughts to ourselves, they will only dig-in deeper and drive up our suspicion and feelings of betrayal. We also cannot move completely forward in love if we are deceiving and undervaluing ourselves.

Because Four can mean teams – your family and friends might be pushing you to do this exercise as well. If you look at their efforts as an intrusion, making you feel uncomfortable and have a ‘why are they butting in’ attitude - the Four of Cups then tell us, these voices are only your own being reinforced. The card says whatever choice you make, it all depends on how honest you want to be with yourself.

We can make a move towards our happiness, even if we are in the midst of a three way tangle. Only you can make this happen – and only you know how truly happy or unhappy you are in your present triangle.

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